Hi parents,
I'm happy to say, after struggling to fix the synchronization on the website, the blog is back up and working again for all groups. As you may have noticed, Stasi, one of the primary counselors, has been keeping the blog going for the past few months. By the way, if you're interested, check out her blog on Psychology Today: A View From Venus.
Tonight's tween group was great, with some new twists and turns. At the start of the session, with only two members missing, we talked about how there were four sessions left, including tonight's meeting. The group then discussed our next planned community outing, which will occur the first session in May. We are planning to go for miniature golf over at Castle Park and then walk to the Galleria where they will be able to choose dinner from one of three restaurants and eat together outdoors. Oh, did I forget to mention that they will also be able to play in the video arcade?
We also made a shopping list for our barbecue, which will occur during our final meeting in May. Finally, dinner for tonight was chosen via “persuasive argument.” I asked each group member, who had an opinion about where we go tonight, to use up to 20 seconds letting the other group members know why they thought their choice should be selected. I/we critiqued their reasons and also rated how close they came to using the full 20 seconds. The shortest time recorded was 2 seconds and the longest time was about 15 seconds. In the end, we chose Chinese food because one group member presented a case that we had not yet been for Chinese food, which was accurate.
Only one group member did not wish to go for Chinese food, and we talked about how sometimes you wind up trying to make the best of it. He had some difficulty finding something to eat, but in the end was able to try different things, even though I'm certain that he got something else to eat once he left group.
All but two members present tonight had one or more LUNCH Points certificates. Rather than doing a raffle, we awarded five dollars to each group member who brought in at least one certificate. Later in the session, toward the end of dinner, we held a bonus round where group members can earn an additional five dollars for being able to state at least one behavior that they earned the certificate for. I didn't expect to award bonuses to all group members, but each of them legitimately recalled at least one behavior on their certificates. Frankly, it was impressive, click here to listen to how they sounded.
Remember that we have switched our raffle prizes to Amazon gift certificates. You will be receiving them as e-mails and can “stack” certificate amounts so your child can buy a larger prize if they wish.
You mentioned that the group was visited by three police officers during the meal? Don't worry, all for the good. I happened to see about the police officers having dinner nearby and asked the lieutenant if it might be possible for the kids to ask them some questions. The officers were great once they got past the advice “listen to your parents,” and I think it was good practice for the kids just ask questions and to see officers up close acting friendly towards them.
We had planned to do one short animation this evening, but that proved to be a bit too ambitious. Next week will have our parent dinner on Wednesday from 5:30 to 7 PM. Watch your e-mails for details.
Also, some of you have asked about the upcoming summer program which begins right after the July 4 holiday. We will be sending out your paperwork in the next couple of days. Currently the team program will be for mornings on Tuesdays and Thursdays and if there is sufficient demand we will hold a second session Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. The 8 to 12-year-old program will be running as usual on Monday Wednesday and Friday during the month of July.
One final note: because the group in two weeks coincides with spring break for many students, we will be sending out a survey to confirm that this works for most of you. If it looks like many of the participants will be absent, we will move it to the fourth week for this month only, meaning that there'll be a group the fourth week of April and again the first week in May. Questions comments etc.? Please e-mail me.
Bruce
Wednesday, April 06, 2011
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Nov 2010 - Session 1
Hi Parents,
Tonight was a full group, just one child missing. Four group members had LUNCH Points and we held a "surprise" raffle at the end of group, giving away one $15 gift card. The entire group participated in our continuing project, "The Awesomest Pet Contest. Go to http://lunchgroups.com/group_projects/group_projects_main1.html to view. Last session they selected several different kinds of animals they liked and named some of the characteristics for them. Tonight different members offered YouTube videos they had seen for their "pets" and the group watched, and voted. We will plan to finish this up next session.
Dinner occurred at Rosti's, which is just down the street. They serve a pretty good kid's meal and it gave the kids a chance to practice everything from manners and conversations to ordering politely and how to pass things to others. They seemed to have a pretty good time. In keeping with our soda rules, we did allow them to have a soda tonight, but after one glass, they switched to water. Similarly, the restaurant gave cookies, but they were packed up and one of the counselors broke them in half (they were largish) for the kids and had them practice taking the one that was closest to them, not evaluating and trying to grab the bigger piece (we tried to make them as even as possible).
One of the things we did tonight was to more uniquely target behaviors that were individualized for each child. Liberal use of raffle tickets (blue tickets for routine prosocial behaviors and red "Hero" tickets for more challenging behaviors). The kids are starting to understand the system better and the power of this portion of the program is beginning to become more meaningful for them.
Then, it was back to the office for a quick LUNCH Points raffle; we gave away one prize, some of the kids played the Wii for a few minutes, and the others either talked or looked at magazines.
Parent pickup went pretty smoothly. All of the families, except one picked up the kids within 10 minutes. Not yet as good as the Tuesday group parents, who did it in five minutes, but improving.
Interesting moment: One child asked me if I could call him mother to pick him up early, saying he didn't feel well. Since the regularly scheduled pickup was only 20 minutes away, there did not seem to be much point, which I explained. Whether or not he was sick, I don't know. I like to believe kids when they say that, but I am also away it is often an "escape tactic." I mentioned to the child that we advise parents, when their children are sick, to make certain they get lots of rest later that evening and not to watch TV or use the computer. He then shared with them that usually when he goes home sick from school, he spends the rest of the day laying in bed, watching TV. I reminded him that, if a child is truly ill, getting sleep and rest is probably best. I also suggested that maybe he says he is sick when he isn't, to which he smiled and nodded his head. So, the lesson to be learned here is that you can usually tell when your child is ill, but if you can't, expressing great concern over their health and advising them it will be a "no TV, no computer" time for most or all of the day may help you figure out whether or not your child is ill or trying to escape from something else.
Important Notice:
We are meeting again next week (due to my being away at a conference the following week) and we will hold our parent meeting. The kids come at the regular time, 4:15pm, but the parents come to the office at 6pm for the meeting which lasts until 7pm. This is a "mandatory meeting." It is where you will learn more about how your kids are doing in detail, hear exactly what techniques we are using, and have opportunities to ask questions. Please come and be on time. We begin at 6pm sharp. Your kids will be having dinner and participating in two raffles while you are in the meeting. Also, please, please please.... no siblings! It makes things very chaotic and disruptive. Questions? Contact me please.
Thanks!
Bruce
Tonight was a full group, just one child missing. Four group members had LUNCH Points and we held a "surprise" raffle at the end of group, giving away one $15 gift card. The entire group participated in our continuing project, "The Awesomest Pet Contest. Go to http://lunchgroups.com/group_projects/group_projects_main1.html to view. Last session they selected several different kinds of animals they liked and named some of the characteristics for them. Tonight different members offered YouTube videos they had seen for their "pets" and the group watched, and voted. We will plan to finish this up next session.
Dinner occurred at Rosti's, which is just down the street. They serve a pretty good kid's meal and it gave the kids a chance to practice everything from manners and conversations to ordering politely and how to pass things to others. They seemed to have a pretty good time. In keeping with our soda rules, we did allow them to have a soda tonight, but after one glass, they switched to water. Similarly, the restaurant gave cookies, but they were packed up and one of the counselors broke them in half (they were largish) for the kids and had them practice taking the one that was closest to them, not evaluating and trying to grab the bigger piece (we tried to make them as even as possible).One of the things we did tonight was to more uniquely target behaviors that were individualized for each child. Liberal use of raffle tickets (blue tickets for routine prosocial behaviors and red "Hero" tickets for more challenging behaviors). The kids are starting to understand the system better and the power of this portion of the program is beginning to become more meaningful for them.
Then, it was back to the office for a quick LUNCH Points raffle; we gave away one prize, some of the kids played the Wii for a few minutes, and the others either talked or looked at magazines.
Parent pickup went pretty smoothly. All of the families, except one picked up the kids within 10 minutes. Not yet as good as the Tuesday group parents, who did it in five minutes, but improving.
Interesting moment: One child asked me if I could call him mother to pick him up early, saying he didn't feel well. Since the regularly scheduled pickup was only 20 minutes away, there did not seem to be much point, which I explained. Whether or not he was sick, I don't know. I like to believe kids when they say that, but I am also away it is often an "escape tactic." I mentioned to the child that we advise parents, when their children are sick, to make certain they get lots of rest later that evening and not to watch TV or use the computer. He then shared with them that usually when he goes home sick from school, he spends the rest of the day laying in bed, watching TV. I reminded him that, if a child is truly ill, getting sleep and rest is probably best. I also suggested that maybe he says he is sick when he isn't, to which he smiled and nodded his head. So, the lesson to be learned here is that you can usually tell when your child is ill, but if you can't, expressing great concern over their health and advising them it will be a "no TV, no computer" time for most or all of the day may help you figure out whether or not your child is ill or trying to escape from something else.
Important Notice:
We are meeting again next week (due to my being away at a conference the following week) and we will hold our parent meeting. The kids come at the regular time, 4:15pm, but the parents come to the office at 6pm for the meeting which lasts until 7pm. This is a "mandatory meeting." It is where you will learn more about how your kids are doing in detail, hear exactly what techniques we are using, and have opportunities to ask questions. Please come and be on time. We begin at 6pm sharp. Your kids will be having dinner and participating in two raffles while you are in the meeting. Also, please, please please.... no siblings! It makes things very chaotic and disruptive. Questions? Contact me please.
Thanks!
Bruce
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
Oct 2010 - Session 1 - School Year Program
Tonight was our first session of the new 11-13 year old "Tween" Group. We had 13 kids (two families needed to cancel at the last minute). We will likely have 15 kids by November. The simple fact is, YOUR KIDS WERE GREAT TONIGHT. Most of them had never met one another and yet, nearly all of them were conversing by the evening's end. It was truly wonderful to watch.
We began the evening by heading over to the office. It had been raining and I was concerned about whether we would get caught up in that. kids piled into the waiting room and found seats, I talked with them about how the group would work, introduced the counselors, and facilitated them introducing themselves to one another. By a wide majority, the group voted to go to Numero Uno for dinner this evening. Nobody reacted negatively to this decision. I decided to have a group go to dinner a little early so they can get to know one another in a more casual environment. This worked out even better than I had imagined. We walked over, with a few comments about pedestrian safety as we went along, and settled in at the restaurant. Eight of the group members sat at one large table, four sat at another table, leaving one member to either sit by himself or with one adult. This wasn't how I wanted to see things, but logistically it was difficult to move around kids would already begun talking to one another. As it turned out the student who sat with me briefly (AB), went over to the table where the three counselors were seated and wound up joining them. (I didn't take it personally). He started telling them jokes, and have an opportunity to practice not laughing before he got to the punch line. He went up saying at that table and appeared to enjoy himself immensely.
The other students were equally engaged in conversations, gentle horsing around, and pretty much everyone appeared to be having a good time. One child, who had brought a cell phone with him, was having difficulty leaving it in his pocket. After a few times of reminding him, I asked him if he would mind living in adult hold it until the end of group. He willingly gave it up, but then later asked if he could use it or make a phone call. Yet another child, who is bidding group before and rarely misbehaves, wound up putting ice down the shirt of the kid next to him. On the one hand we have a no touching rule and on the other hand it's sometimes nice to see kids acting silly in ways that are pretty harmless. I chose to go the latter and will monitor and watch whether this approach appears successful. Sometimes I have different rules for different children, depending upon what the target behaviors are identified by their parents and how they behave in group.
The kids did just fine in ordering pizzas and other food for themselves, with some ordering appetizers which they shared with others. This always provides a nice opportunity to explain that you don't use your “personal” fork to get food and pop in your mouth. Instead I worked with the kids to use a fork that they're not eating from, transferring it to a plate in front of them and then eating. For some of the kids we worked on holding utensils properly and JF for example, immediately began holding his fork differently, in a more age appropriate manner. Several of the group members decided to share a large Caesar salad and we also ordered extra pizza. Some of them wanted to know if we were having dessert tonight and I informed him that since we decided to have soda, that counted as our dessert. I also let them know that we don't always have dessert and we don't always order soda. Some nights will have soda and our rule is that the kids can have a one half refill, then switch to water. Other times the only drink we permit is water.
After finishing up in group, and thank goodness we had no rain during our travels, we headed back to the office. During meal time to the counselors, Carli and Stasi ( not to be confused with the “Stacy” who you have spoken to and had e-mail correspondence with from the office) Went around to the different kids and tried to have them think of nicknames. As you may recall from the parent orientation, we never put identifying child information on the Internet, but we will use nicknames and/or initials. Seven of the 13 group members came up with nick names the first time around, and all of them were able to come up with one mighty and the group. We encourage them not to use just their own initials or something easily identifying and they will have opportunities to make changes over the next couple of sessions.
Having completed this, the kids decorated envelopes that they will use for keeping the raffle tickets and they were introduced to the LUNCH Points online computer program for generalizing behaviors in the home environment. That's a mouthful, huh? What that means is that you, as parents, will be able to login and report on your child's behavior from a choice of nearly 50 behaviors. You will print out a LUNCH Points certificate which your child then needs to take responsibility for and bring to group. Please do not take responsibility for them. It is fine to remind them and asked them if they remembered it, but if you see that they have forgotten it, do not make a trip back home and please do not ask me if they can have a special exemption “just this one time.” this is a reasonably harmless way for them to learn that being organized and responsible for their possessions matters. I have already informed them that we will have a “ surprise raffle” next time for LUNCH Points.
In the few remaining minutes of group, I showed them a video that has become very popular on YouTube. We will often show select music movies or animations that I previously screened or shown to other groups.
Perhaps however, the most amazing thing of all that occurred tonight was how prompt all of the parents, and I mean all of the parents, were in picking your children up. We were out there at 6:45 PM, and by 6:48 PM all 13 children have been picked up. Let's hope this the beginning of a consistent trend.
Our next group meeting will be the third week in October, to be held on October 20. We will be having a parent dinner during the fourth week in October and you will receive an announcement regarding the shortly.
Thanks for sending such a great group of kids and I look forward to seeing everyone in two weeks. If you have any questions please call the office or e-mail me.
Bruce
We began the evening by heading over to the office. It had been raining and I was concerned about whether we would get caught up in that. kids piled into the waiting room and found seats, I talked with them about how the group would work, introduced the counselors, and facilitated them introducing themselves to one another. By a wide majority, the group voted to go to Numero Uno for dinner this evening. Nobody reacted negatively to this decision. I decided to have a group go to dinner a little early so they can get to know one another in a more casual environment. This worked out even better than I had imagined. We walked over, with a few comments about pedestrian safety as we went along, and settled in at the restaurant. Eight of the group members sat at one large table, four sat at another table, leaving one member to either sit by himself or with one adult. This wasn't how I wanted to see things, but logistically it was difficult to move around kids would already begun talking to one another. As it turned out the student who sat with me briefly (AB), went over to the table where the three counselors were seated and wound up joining them. (I didn't take it personally). He started telling them jokes, and have an opportunity to practice not laughing before he got to the punch line. He went up saying at that table and appeared to enjoy himself immensely.
The other students were equally engaged in conversations, gentle horsing around, and pretty much everyone appeared to be having a good time. One child, who had brought a cell phone with him, was having difficulty leaving it in his pocket. After a few times of reminding him, I asked him if he would mind living in adult hold it until the end of group. He willingly gave it up, but then later asked if he could use it or make a phone call. Yet another child, who is bidding group before and rarely misbehaves, wound up putting ice down the shirt of the kid next to him. On the one hand we have a no touching rule and on the other hand it's sometimes nice to see kids acting silly in ways that are pretty harmless. I chose to go the latter and will monitor and watch whether this approach appears successful. Sometimes I have different rules for different children, depending upon what the target behaviors are identified by their parents and how they behave in group.
The kids did just fine in ordering pizzas and other food for themselves, with some ordering appetizers which they shared with others. This always provides a nice opportunity to explain that you don't use your “personal” fork to get food and pop in your mouth. Instead I worked with the kids to use a fork that they're not eating from, transferring it to a plate in front of them and then eating. For some of the kids we worked on holding utensils properly and JF for example, immediately began holding his fork differently, in a more age appropriate manner. Several of the group members decided to share a large Caesar salad and we also ordered extra pizza. Some of them wanted to know if we were having dessert tonight and I informed him that since we decided to have soda, that counted as our dessert. I also let them know that we don't always have dessert and we don't always order soda. Some nights will have soda and our rule is that the kids can have a one half refill, then switch to water. Other times the only drink we permit is water.
After finishing up in group, and thank goodness we had no rain during our travels, we headed back to the office. During meal time to the counselors, Carli and Stasi ( not to be confused with the “Stacy” who you have spoken to and had e-mail correspondence with from the office) Went around to the different kids and tried to have them think of nicknames. As you may recall from the parent orientation, we never put identifying child information on the Internet, but we will use nicknames and/or initials. Seven of the 13 group members came up with nick names the first time around, and all of them were able to come up with one mighty and the group. We encourage them not to use just their own initials or something easily identifying and they will have opportunities to make changes over the next couple of sessions.
Having completed this, the kids decorated envelopes that they will use for keeping the raffle tickets and they were introduced to the LUNCH Points online computer program for generalizing behaviors in the home environment. That's a mouthful, huh? What that means is that you, as parents, will be able to login and report on your child's behavior from a choice of nearly 50 behaviors. You will print out a LUNCH Points certificate which your child then needs to take responsibility for and bring to group. Please do not take responsibility for them. It is fine to remind them and asked them if they remembered it, but if you see that they have forgotten it, do not make a trip back home and please do not ask me if they can have a special exemption “just this one time.” this is a reasonably harmless way for them to learn that being organized and responsible for their possessions matters. I have already informed them that we will have a “ surprise raffle” next time for LUNCH Points.
In the few remaining minutes of group, I showed them a video that has become very popular on YouTube. We will often show select music movies or animations that I previously screened or shown to other groups.
Perhaps however, the most amazing thing of all that occurred tonight was how prompt all of the parents, and I mean all of the parents, were in picking your children up. We were out there at 6:45 PM, and by 6:48 PM all 13 children have been picked up. Let's hope this the beginning of a consistent trend.
Our next group meeting will be the third week in October, to be held on October 20. We will be having a parent dinner during the fourth week in October and you will receive an announcement regarding the shortly.
Thanks for sending such a great group of kids and I look forward to seeing everyone in two weeks. If you have any questions please call the office or e-mail me.
Bruce
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